I’m having a hard time writing this blog, because I have not yet talked to people involved in what I am about to cover. If you’re familiar with Kansas United Methodism, you’ve probably heard about the pastor, staff and bulk of the membership of a new church – GracePoint – leaving The UMC. The pastor turned in his credentials and took, according to Sunday’s Wichita Eagle, about 3/4 of the congregation to form a new church.
So, now there are two GracePoints: GracePoint Community Church and GracePoint United Methodist Church. There is a lot of hearsay about why the leaders and members did what they did. I have some ideas (that I think are pretty sound), but I’ll forgo that speculation and get to what I think needs attention.
I should also say that I have some extra-strong feelings about this matter because recently I have become interim pastor for two small congregations in Arkansas City, Kansas. Most of one congregation and about half of the other one left their UMC congregations in anger over perceived mistreatment of their pastor (who had been removed by official denominational action) and the annual conference’s lack of concern for these two congregations. I am witness to the fallout from church splits. That said, here are my thoughts:
1. Nobody wins in a church split. Nobody is helped. The Body of Christ is depleted and demoralized, period.
2. The people who leave think they’re leaving problems behind. They aren’t. Inevitably, every congregation has conflict and when that happens, the folks who left won’t be able to blame the United Methodist Church, the annual conference, the bishop, some board, or anybody else. I hope, when that moment comes, that the leavers will be able to look themselves in the eye and consider their ways. It is the only way they’ll grow.
3. When people leave, they leave behind wounded, confused friends. They leave their friends! How people leave makes all the difference in the world. If you’re going to leave, talk to your friends and authority figures before you do. Have some courage. Be honest. Take care for the Body of Christ, even if you think God is calling you to leave and especially if you think the other parties (including the bishop, the annual conference, et. al.) are at fault. Let me repeat: how people leave makes all the difference.
3.a. Years ago, while in graduate school, I was on staff of a UM Church in a Chicago suburb. Some of the younger leaders were having trouble with the senior pastor and one by one, couple by couple, they began leaving. I had poured my heart into some of those people. When one more of them threatened to leave, I shouted (yes, I shouted), “You’re not just leaving ______ (the pastor’s name and the object of their anger). You’re leaving us!” Do relationships matter any more?
3.b. People who think of themselves as biblical Christians better pay attention to the whole Bible when deciding whether or not to leave. Have I said this already? How you leave matters. My biggest concern right now, given the fact that the recent split made the front page of the Sunday Wichita Eagle, is that we Christians are offering a bad witness to the world. Our words about unity and love are hollow, hypocritical. Shame on us.
4. People who leave angry need to check, double-check and check again the status and condition of their hearts. Bitterness is self-destructive and will affect the quality of their spiritual lives, their lives in Christ. If they harbor anger, pride, arrogance or any other unholy affection, they will pay a spiritual price for the way they have handled this matter. God is not mocked.
Oh, Lord, by your mercy, heal the broken hearts.
3 thoughts on “Another Church Split”
Good thoughts, Steve. Did you read Wesley Report today? He blogs about GP again…you might find it of interest.
I am a lay UMC member on the verge of leaving my church and denomination. I have come to distrust my pastor and the UMC for a wide number of reasons, ranging from incoherent theology (e.g., John Spong and Nicky Gumble being taught almost simultaneously in different rooms of the church, my pastor undermining Jesus’ statement that he is The Way, The Truth and The Life..and John Wesley no where in sight) to the bishop system and conduct at the last General Conference and disgust with the General Board of Church and Society. There is no way I can hope to change these things. So why stick it out? My wife won’t let me tithe another dollar because she has seen the same things and the aguish it is causing me. I guess you could say the UMC has become my stumbling block. I would like your opinion on when it is appropriate for a lay person to depart. Thank you.
I obviously don’t know your situation, but I certainly hear the anguish in your comment. I can make a general comment. I think it is appropriate to leave when you have spoken directly with people by whom you are troubled (e.g. the bishop and your pastor?) and shared your concern to the best of your ability. If need be, take a couple of people with you who share your concerns. If you have spoken to members of the Body and you feel like you have made no progress; if you think that you can no longer be a faithful disciple of Jesus by staying in the UM Church and if you leave without bitterness in your heart, then I think you’re in good shape to leave. By bitterness, I do not mean hurt and anguish (in other words, strong feelings). Wesley talked about the root of bitterness springing up in people, which actually does damage to the person who is bitter, not to the people toward whom a person may feel angry. In other words, there is a way to leave that is spiritually whole and “clean” in terms of the relationships with people. One caution: when you leave, you are leaving some of your spiritual family behind. Make sure you communicate with them.